Dear Mrs. Hall, You sure became famous real fast, was that the goal all along?

Please read this blog post FYI (if you're a teenage girl). Now type into a search engine "response to FYI (if you're a teenage girl)" and LOOK at all the responses it's garnered.

A friend brought the above blog post to my attention this morning. I do not belong to any social media sites (except Instagram) so this recent controversy hadn't crossed my path.

There are problems with Mrs. Hall's post, and there are issues with the responses. But the more interesting issue for me is-- Are sexy selfies by pre-teen and teenagers ok? Is being sexually overt at a younger age through photos of oneself now completely acceptable?  What are the implications and possible rewards and  consequences to this behaviour? In photographs on social media sites, posing in a sexual way, (i.e.pouted expression, arched back, chest thrust out, legs spread out or up in some fashion), as well as revealing a lot of bare skin in daily fashion choices, is commonplace now. I'm still sussing out the good, the bad & the ugly behind these new-ish trends.
      When I refer to the "they" I think we can for convenience distinguish by generation. Gen-X'ers, like myself seem less likely to post endless streams of narcissistic self portraits with the come hither stare (of course there are always the exceptions). Generation Y & Z on the other hand, fill their social media sites with a LOT of these pictures. What's the difference? Is it because we are older and feel like we look less beautiful & sexy? Is it because we were growing up on the heels of our sexual revolution mothers? 

   One could argue that popular culture is different, more explicit; as shown with the recent sexual performance of Miss Cyrus and her gyrating crotch on a giant foam finger. But popular culture can't be the cause for the explosion of scantily clad teenagers; who commonly waltz around, with no bras, bare midriffs and muffin tops; breasts spilling out of their summer tanks, the commonplace hot pink thong drawing attention to the very low-rise jeans. No, we can't look to pop culture as the cause, as my generation had Madonna and videos like Justify My Love. Surely Madge's black and white short film from 1991 makes Robin Thicke's Blurred Lines look clownish. (Funny that YouTube makes you check an "age appropriate" box to view the Blurred Lines video, but there is no such pop-up on the Madonna clip)
     So there's something deeper simmering beneath the endless stream of these self-portraits. There's a level of competition and I fear a deep well of low self-confidence that only rises when they get a  "like". There's an emptiness that pervades these photos, and behind every made-up face they are home alone, bored and now are posting photos to get approval, to get recogntion, to be loved, to be valued.  The ego prevails.

My friend brought up a different point of view, and admits that at times she sees the odd teenager truly wearing something that is far too tight (as in-gee, I bet you that's really uncomfortable). My friend looks at this phenomena with respect and encouragement for the sexual freedom of women. She argues that if young women  are feeling that comfortable to bare all, and can walk around daily with "less" clothing (than we seem to remember wearing at that age), that this is a good thing. Young girls are starting to feel much more comfortable with their bodies, shapes and sizes at a younger age. Perhaps these young girls are far more accepting of their bodies- whereas with our generation, this confidence in our bodies didn't prevail until we were into our 30's & 40's (and sometimes even later in life).
I think her opinion is idealistic and not reflective of why these young girls are photographing themselves in their pajamas at night, or endless beach bikini shots, or sexy expression portraits. I don't think it's because of personal acceptance and an inner contentment of "wow, I really am beautiful." I think they are doing these selfies to acquire that elusive confidence. That the inner love isn't there and the only way they know how to feel accepted, appreciated and gorgeous is to get the recognition of others, often men, sometimes anonymous and not always safe.
Let's face it anyone can post a picture of themself (and I have) and the comments that come through are always complimentary. No one is going to comment on a regular photo of me and say "That's not a good picture of you," or "You're lips look non-existent when you smile with your vampire like fangs".  Unless it's a situation of bullying (which is a whole other entry on the problem with posting pictures of yourself) no one on your friends list is going to comment on the pic and say "you are ugly."

So it comes down to gratification I guess. This entry is quite rambl-y and I don't even have hard and fast opinions set on the above topics. It's been an interesting conversation.
Mrs. Hall did direct her post to teenage girls and as many of the responses have pointed out, where is her parenting strong-hand in raising her sons? There were some very questionable remarks she made about how men respond to sexual photos (yikes!)
I'll leave you with one of my favourite photos of myself- back in my street fighting days....

Of course I'm doing this for acceptance, love and endless complimentary comments. No, really. Please give me the love. I'm revealing the curve of my neck, and it's hard to tell if I'm wearing a bra-definitely asking for it.